RobertaSue is a character (who insists that her name is all one word but two capital letters) who came to me over time through daily writing prompts. My two writing buddies and I have to use the prompt in the first line, set the timer for seven minutes, then write away until the alarm goes off. This prompt line was, "Her hats and clothes speak volumes."
Her hats and her clothes speak volumes. I don’t know where RobertaSue gets her taste but it is as though she has never looked at a copy of Vogue, Elle, or Glamour to get some fashion ideas. She does all her shopping in at Goodwill, Value Village and the Funky Jane’s in Fremont, and thinks she is dressed to the nines always, but I don’t want to break her illusion because she is the most entertaining sack of feathers and fabric I have ever seen on one person.
She is outrageous and I don’t want to cure her of that because she has so much fun. She spends at least two days a week shopping for her frocks and her closet is filled with hat boxes putting Hedda Hopper to shame.
But mostly she looks like a hat rack escapee from the Daughters of the Revolution meeting hall. Her favorite outfit currently is a canary yellow-two piece serge suit, with a chartreuse collar and a huge Panama hat with blue and green Macaw feathers, looking like the beautiful bird just crashed into her head at a high rate of speed.
We were invited to a high tea at Mrs. Farnsworth’s house on Sunday and RobertaSue trying to impress this grand dame of town suited up in what she thought was her most stylist outfit. I had to say that it certainly was a major fashion statement not to be imitated by anyone in the future. She wore a pair of Gucci gold leather platform shoes with five-inch tall rainbow colored soles with neon pink and purple thigh highs. She had a blue and red plaid pleated mini skirt stopped off with a white blouse and blue velvet blazer trimmed in gold braid. Her hat was very tall and dripping with yellow and blue tulle a contender for first prize at the Royal Ascot Week. RobertaSue thought she looked like a sophisticated English school girl but came across as a Champion Costume mannequin wantabe. She means well and certainly brightens up a dull rainy afternoon. Mrs. Farnsworth has impeccable English manners and didn’t bat an eye when RobertaSue walked in, or I should say tittered in, on her thick-soled shoes. Several ladies were stifling their merriment behind gloved hands and tried not to stare. I for one found this costumed performance a riot and had to give RobertaSue credit for having so much chutzpah and greatly livened up what would have been a prosaic gathering.